Handling anger at non-vegan lifestyles

It IS frustrating, but....

You will notice in the title, that I did not say handling anger at non-vegans, but at non-vegan lifestyles. And that's the whole thing, right there. When we raise our kids, we say, hate the behavior, not the child. And while non-vegans certainly shouldn't be treated like children, they should be treated as kindly as you would treat your child. Everyone should.

But what about when you get really angry? It's easy to do so. Especially when you're a victim of vegan bashing or bad jokes. People do have a tendency to laugh at the vegan lifestyle, for whatever reason.

And it's certainly frustrating to watch as those around you do exactly what you're trying to prevent because that's the way it's always been done.

Well, you could do what I do, I guess. I write about it. I prove my point in an article, post it on social media and reap the benefits.

What do I mean by reap the benefits? Well, for some reason, writing on controversial subjects really makes those page views soar. People's emotions get all involved, you know? And anytime that happens, you're looking at viral voodoo.

It's especially profitable when people become angry at your viewpoint.

Now, I don't make people angry on purpose, mind you. That's not really my thing. My thing is compassion. But somehow, even that angers certain people. They pass around my link to their friends to show them what an idiot I am and suddenly, my article or blog hits it big.

Meh, whatever. At least they're reading it. Maybe some of it will sink in. Or not.

The point is that the best comeback for anger directed against the vegan lifestyle is to just live your life. Be happy. Do your thing. Talk about it if you like. After all, everyone else on the planet is free to talk about their lifestyle, so why not vegans?

And if you're a writer, use that pent up anger in a positive way. Write. Educate. Rejoice on paper. And perhaps accidentally, you'll influence someone or at least upset them enough to spread it around where someone else will be inspired. In which case, you'll be teaching more people to be compassionate and make a bit of a profit doing it as well.

No harm done. Compassion retained. Anger squelched. Mission accomplished. Well, not completely. But at least you can say that you're making an effort and remaining compassionate to all. Yes?

What's your vegan way?

Vegan cheese. Yes or no?

How do you do vegan? We we each choose our path on the vegan road, don't we? Not all vegans are alike, just as, not all omnivores are alike. Surprise! But the biggest surprise to me is how cruel other vegans can be to vegans who are not on their path. Compassion is our mantra. Kindness is our thing and yet, a few of us don't project that to our fellow vegans.

For instance, what is your take on vegan meat and cheese? Do you do it or not do it? How about vegan processed foods? Yes or no? Is it merely your diet that's vegan or do you choose vegan everything (clothes, shoes, etc.) Have you become completely vegan yet or are you progressing toward becoming vegan, like myself?

Do you make your own vegan meats and cheeses or purchase the store-bought kind? Are you as 100% vegan as possible or do you bend a bit with the branches of society? Do you pass on the vegan “word” at every given opportunity?

Do you educate others or refrain from the reactionary melee? Do you attend protests? Do you speak out regularly, even at the risk of losing friendships or do you choose to remain silent and simply live your life as an example to others?

And here's my point:

My personal opinion, for what it's worth, coming from this tiny grain of sand in an infinite universe, is this; All vegans are OK with me. And by the way, maybe I don't agree with their lifestyle, but all those other people are too. We have to support each other, you guys. All of us have to help and guide each other with love and kindness. Otherwise, what's the point in being vegan at all?

So, my vegan friends, back to the subject at hand. Do you look down on other vegans because they eat processed food, “fake” food or because they still haven't made it to their goal? Or do you lend them your support and offer a hand up if they want one? Do you judge people, vegan or not, because they're not living the exact way you feel is right?

Because, you guys, whether you know it or not, that's not exactly compassionate, is it? That's not vegan at all. That's not what we're fighting for. It's not kind or compassionate. It's not understanding and frankly (once again from this inconsequential speck of sand in an infinite universe) it just doesn't feel right.

Be the kind of vegan you wish to be. Celebrate the fact that you are making progress or have reached your goal. Absolutely. But most of all, please, do vegan your way and give others the same opportunity, consideration and appreciation. Because the more encouragement and the less belittlement people receive, the more likely they are to stick to their goals.

Yes, it's that simple. Respect begets respect. Example is the best teacher. And every kindness multiplies.

3 Lifestyle choices with Vegan connections

As delicious as vegan food is, that's not all there is to going vegan.

When I began making the switch from Vegetarian to Vegan, I began making connections I never have before. There's so much more to Veganism than just diet. It's a whole different way of life. It encompasses so much!

There is environmentalism and sustainability. It's also about making a minimal impact and creating less waste. It's about doing the right thing for planetary and animal life, human or otherwise. So if you're going Vegan, whether for health or ethical reasons, why not change your whole lifestyle to reflect those values and concepts?

Sustainability

A friend of mine told me once that her choice was not to go Vegan, but to embrace sustainable living. That's wonderful. I applaud her efforts. I know she's very dedicated to sustainable living. However, I believe that being sustainable alone isn't enough. For example, my friend raises chickens. She treats them well, but even so, there are humane issues she may not be aware of.

For instance, laying hens rely on the calcium that goes into their unfertilized eggs to sustain themselves. When we take them, we force them to lay more, thus shortening their life spans. Of course, there are many other reasons sustainable practices fall short. That's just one example. So, why stop at sustainable or Vegan? Why not combine them for a more humane way of life?

Environmentalism

Choosing a Vegan diet alone makes a huge impact. Still, it won't completely save the planet. Why not carry those Vegan principles through to the rest of your lifestyle choices? It makes no sense to preach about the environmental impact of a meat based diet if you don't recycle, for instance.

If you're a shopaholic, you're no friend to the earth either. What do you do to help the planet outside of your Vegan diet? Not adopting other environmentally sound practices can make even the strictest of vegans seem hypocritical.

Minimalism

Minimalism, sustainability, environmentalism and a Vegan diet are all connected. Like the rest, minimalism focuses on doing the least harm to the planet and life in general. It's a low impact lifestyle. Own less, occupy less space and you do less harm.

So, why stop at Veganism? When you dare to make the connection, do something about it. You'll improve your life and the lives of every living being on the planet. Go Vegan. Go minimalist. Live sustain-ably. Care for the environment. They're not exclusive ways of life. They're inclusive. Nature is waiting for you to make the connection and make your life more meaningful than it already is.

What are you waiting for?

Connecting with bad press as a vegan

Whether you're going vegan, like me or already there, chances are that you've been impacted by the bad press surrounding the vegan lifestyle. It's pretty hard to take sometimes right? Heck, sometimes I even get grief from vegans who feel that I'm not trying hard enough. Let's face it, veganism is not exactly mainstream. And even your fellow vegans can take it too far, hurting your feelings and making you feel isolated.

Your fellow vegans can turn on you.

We are passionately compassionate, aren't we? And like it or not, there are those of us who are critical of those who have not yet reached their goals. To which I sarcastically say, I am so sorry for being human. I'll try harder to be infallible in the future. I bow to your greatness. LOL

All vegans get a bad rap due to bad apples.

Unfortunately, those same overly critical vegans are often the very people non-vegans look to as an example of what a vegan is. They ironically spread the word about how wonderful it is to be compassionate, save the earth and prevent resource depletion/starvation by being.... ahem.... somewhat less than compassionate. What a shame.

People are very critical of things they don't understand.

Many people believe veganism is some kind of cult. It's not. It's just a bunch of people who have done the research and found veganism to be the most sustainable and compassionate lifestyle choice one can make and decided that's the path they'd like to take in life. And yes, of course we talk about it a lot. It's important to us, just as other people's passions are important to them, right?

Laughing it off is no joke.

How often, as a vegan or potential vegan, have you been greatly hurt by the “jokes” of your non-vegan friends and acquaintances? Personally, I can't even count the number of times I've just been minding my own business, not saying a word about veganism and been attacked with non-vegan “humor.” And no offense intended, but honestly, I have literally heard every joke, pun quip or argument against veganism in existence. I just don't even respond any more. It's not worth the aggravation.

Tradition is easier to comprehend than fact, especially when....

Tradition is on your side if you're a non-vegan. We get it, right? People have supposedly been eating meat, dairy and eggs since the very beginning. But hey, who said cavemen were smart? Just because something has always been done doesn't mean it's the best thing to do or the best way to live, does it? Of course not.

But again, I get it. It's hard to accept certain facts, when you've been told otherwise your entire life. So, I try to be patient, understanding and above all, compassionate, because that's the whole idea of being vegan, isn't it? Connecting with bad press as a vegan happens often and mostly without provocation. But if you try hard enough, you can emit the compassion you preach and squelch it.

Going vegan with vegetarians in the house

Cheese is my nemesis.

We all know that going vegan with omnivores in the house is rough. But what about vegetarians? That's just as tough. It might even be tougher. Here's why.

In a word, cheese. It's everywhere, you guys. And it's my nemesis. I have never had a hard time giving up meat. In fact, I haven't eaten it in well over 35 years. Not a problem. But those vegetarians with their cheese on everything diet, well, they're killing me here.

And I'm craving and caving big time. You see, I have to feed one of them. The cheese is in my hands daily. It doesn't have a great distance to travel to reach my mouth. So, occasionally, it does.

I don't feel good about that, you guys. In fact, I hate it. And I've tried it all. Not the cheese, but the ways to avoid temptation.

I'll keep on trying, of course, because I know that a vegan diet has health benefits, planetary benefits and it saves other animals from, well, a lot of things no one should experience.

Now, luckily, I don't have a problem with eggs. Except when one of my housemates makes conventional cookies or other baked goods with eggs in them. Why, oh why do they do that? I can make vegan baked goods that taste just as good as theirs. I even taught them how. They like them too.

What's the big deal about consuming unfertilized egg embryos anyway? Yuck! Is it really worth it? They're not even good for you. It's been proven. So, I can resist the cookies much more easily than the cheese. But every once in a while, I slip up there too.

So, there you go. It's every bit as hard going vegan in a house full of vegetarians as it is to do it in a house full of omnivores. And we have some of those here too. I'm not tempted by their meals at all. But the smell is atrocious. I detest the smell of death and it's everywhere.

Going vegan is a challenge, you guys, no matter who you live with, unless you're lucky enough to live in a house full of vegans. But I still maintain that it's worth it. A vegan diet and lifestyle is the only diet and lifestyle that could save the planet, single-handedly.

I also felt much better, health-wise, when I was vegan. I'm working on it, you guys. And I will get back there. So, wish me luck. I will need lots of it with all these vegetarians shoving cheese in my face all day. I love them, of course. I just don't love the temptations.

Am I still vegan if I fall off the wagon?

You might have noticed that my description says “going vegan” now, instead of “avid vegan.” It happens to the best of us, you guys. I try not to judge others for caving either, because it has and is happening to me right now. Now, I prefer to change my status to “going vegan” when things like this happen. That's because it indicates that I'm not quite there yet. Still, I think it's your business how you describe yourself in this situation.

I also have strong feelings against making people who are trying to change feel bad about themselves. It's true that when one falls off the vegan wagon, they can't technically call themselves vegan. But is it really that big of a deal? I don't think so. What's in a word? Roses smell the same no matter what they're called, etc.

So, if someone I know is trying to go vegan but slipping up here and there, even for extended time periods, I'm OK with them calling themselves vegan, especially if it helps them focus on getting back on track. It's about visualization, you guys. However you see yourself and whatever you describe yourself as will eventually come to be. It's inevitable.

Who knows? Maybe by saying that I'm going vegan, I'm giving myself a subliminal excuse to never get there. Still, I just don't feel right calling myself vegan when I'm not there yet. If you are, however, off the vegan wagon, please feel free to call yourself whatever you want. Especially if it helps you focus on your goal. And please refrain from giving people who aren't there yet such a hard time.

We're all in this together. Let's build each other up instead of passing judgment, shall we?

Vegan is not a dirty word

Vegans aren't that bad. They even give out free cookies sometimes!

 Gee whiz, Wally. The way some people talk about vegans, you would think they were the most hateful people in the universe. Always pushing their lifestyle on you, right? Always pointing out issues you may not be aware of to give you a heads up? Damn them for being so kind and considerate of other animals. Such horrible people!

But did you ever think that maybe, just maybe, vegans care just as much about humans as they do about other animals? Well, most other people anyway. All except the ones that treat them like rogue parasites And you know what? Most vegans are even pretty nice to those people too, despite the blatant discrimination.

Folks, seriously, we're not all that bad. But I will tell you this. I'm only at the stage of transitioning to vegan life and I have been the target of hundreds of subtle and not so subtle put downs. I've been un-friended and openly mocked by several people that are close to me simply for speaking my mind and spreading awareness. I have been witness to or been the victim of thousands upon thousands of vegan slurs, put-downs and “jokes.”

It hurts, you guys. It hurts more than you can imagine, especially when it comes from friends and family. And frankly, when you're the target, it just isn't all that funny. So, if you're wondering why some vegans are so defensive, look no further than the way they're treated and the fact that most people think it's OK to make vegans feel like crap.

Yup, that's the biggest insult of all. The fact that vegan bashing, unlike other forms of prejudice is completely acceptable in our society. I've even had good friends make vegan jokes with me sitting at the dinner table and actually expect me to laugh along with them, because, although they don't respect my lifestyle, I'm supposed to respect theirs, as well as their “right” to make me the butt of their jokes.

If I were a religious person, people would be defending my right to speak about my religion. In fact, if I fit into any category, other than vegan, people would have my back on being able to freely express myself in the land of the free.

What the heck is it about being or going vegan that makes people think it's OK to emit such blatant hatred?

And it has to be said that vegans aren't anywhere near as pushy as omnivores. Every day, I live in a world where I am a minority. True, other minorities suffer greatly and vegans are not the most discriminated against in comparison. But our entire society is based on omnivorism. Think about it. Everywhere we go, we are inundated with it.

From the advertising on our favorite shows, to the exclusively omnivorous menus at 99% of restaurants, to the Facebook posts of our friend's picnics, recipes, barbecues and more, we cannot escape omnivorism. It's ever-present. We stare it smack in the face every second of our lives. Plus, every time we simply mention that we're vegan or going vegan, we have to go through an interrogation or be accused of forcefulness. But do we accuse omnivores of shoving their lifestyle down our throats? Nope.

And yes, there are a few vegans who make the rest of us look bad. There are rude and obnoxious people in every crowd, vegan or not. But folks, most of us are just excited about the information we've found that indicates being vegan is healthier, better for the planet and could quite possibly solve a few of the world's biggest problems, like starvation and water shortages. That's why we're vegan.

We want to share that information because we care about you, about other animals and about the future of the planet that we all depend upon for survival. We're not trying to force anything on anyone. We're just the messengers. You don't have to believe the message or even listen to it if you're not interested. And you don't normally shoot the messenger because the message is not to your liking, right? Nah, unless the messenger is vegan. Because then, It's ON!

You know, I've even seen people discount highly accurate information because it came to them via a vegan. A vegan didn't write it. A vegan didn't do the research. The evidence was airtight. But since a vegan told them about it or promoted it, they automatically called bullshit. Pardon my French. LOL

Now, how ridiculous is that? How do people come to hate an entire group of people with beliefs that differ from their own that much? I just don't get it. Folks, vegans are not the enemy. Vegan is not a dirty word. It's simply a term used to describe people who are trying to live a more peaceful, kinder and more environmentally friendly lifestyle.

And of course, we want to share that with other people. Because it's an awesome way to live. But mostly, because we don't just care about other animals. We care about human animals too. We want to see every animal, human or otherwise on this planet be as happy as we are. That's it. That's our big ulterior motive.

Now tell me, is that so horrible?

Folks, don't let society turn you into a hater, no matter who that hate is directed at. Bigotry is ugly in any form. Ya, even when it's directed at those “awful” vegans.